Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Left Behindfeld, Act I, Scene III

Left Behindfeld: a comedy about a book about nothing. The following covers the "activity" of Tribulation Force.

Featuring:
“Buck” Williams = Jerry Seinfeld
Rayford Steele = George Costanza
Chloe Steele = Elaine Bennis
Rev. Bruce Barnes = Kramer
Guest starring Christina Hendricks as Hattie Durham
Plus special guest star playing the role of Nicolae Carpathia


[SCENE: GEORGE and ELAINE are sitting in a car, driving through downtown Chicago]

GEORGE: So, uh, what’s going on between you & Jerry?

ELAINE: What? I dunno. He seems nice. He does call me an awful lot though.

GEORGE: Yeah, me too. I think he just likes the phone.

ELAINE: Who likes the phone?

GEORGE: He does, apparently.

ELAINE: I mean, if it’s for someone out-of-town, I can see using the phone to chat. Or if it’s late at night and you can’t meet in person, I can see using the phone.

GEORGE: He’s called me late at night when he couldn’t sleep.

ELAINE: (pause)

GEORGE: He just wanted to talk about the Bible. It was a Biblical chat! Nothing more! Not that there’s anything wrong with that!

ELAINE: Aaanyways, why would you call to talk to someone who lives in the same city as you? Just seems kind of weird to me.

GEORGE: Then don’t see him. Don’t talk to him.

ELAINE: On the other hand, he does have that sort of “older man/father figure” thing going for him. And you seem to think he’s OK.

GEORGE: Did you know Hattie Durham was in town?

ELAINE: Your ex-girlfriend? No, why?

GEORGE: She’s not my ex-girlfriend, nothing physical ever happened. I heard she got a new job with the U.N., and I wanted to make sure everything was OK with her. You know, how she’s getting along with the new boss, if she likes New York, if she’s seeing anyone…

ELAINE: You want to call her up and ask her THAT?

GEORGE: Actually, we sort of parted on not-so-great terms, so I was kind of hoping that… you would call her. You know, woman-to-woman.

ELAINE: Why should I do that?

GEORGE: Well, maybe if there was a certain journalistic-type you were interested in, I could arrange a date. (GEORGE claps his hands in excitement) That’s perfect! A double-date! You tell her you want to meet with Jerry, but that you need a, ah, what’s the female term for a wingman?

ELAINE: Wingman?

GEORGE: Nevermind. Just tell her you don’t want to meet him alone, so ask if she’ll have dinner with you.

ELAINE: You’re not going to be there, are you?

GEORGE: It’s perfect! It’s foolproof!

ELAINE: Oh, there’s proof of a fool around here somewhere…

[END SCENE]

Monday, September 21, 2009

Left Behindfeld, Act I, Scene II

Left Behindfeld: a comedy about a book about nothing. The following covers the "activity" of Tribulation Force from pages 60-74

Featuring:
“Buck” Williams = Jerry Seinfeld
Rayford Steele = George Costanza
Chloe Steele = Elaine Bennis
Rev. Bruce Barnes = Kramer
Guest starring Christina Hendricks as Hattie Durham
Plus special guest star playing the role of Nicolae Carpathia

[SCENE: JERRY’S apartment. JERRY is talking on the phone, finishing a conversation. He hangs up, then immediately dials his voice mail.]

JERRY: No messages on voice mail. No one called while I was on the phone. Good. I’m all caught up on messages.

KRAMER bolts through the door, into the room, looking confused and disheveled.

JERRY: Oh, hi Kramer! Glad you could stop by. You seem a little agitated.

KRAMER begins pacing back and forth, head & hands twitching.

KRAMER: I’ve been reading the Book of Revelations, Jerry. Bad stuff, man. Really bad stuff. The End Times are upon us, and it’s NOT good news!

JERRY: OK, calm down. What have you found out?

KRAMER: Well, for starters, that Montana guy?

JERRY: Carpathia?

KRAMER: Yeah, him. I think he’s the Anti-Christ!

JERRY: Of course he’s the Anti-Christ. I told you that. I saw him murder someone, brainwash everyone else in the room, and divide up control of the world to his ten lieutenants.

KRAMER: Yeah, right. At that meeting you were never at, for that story that you never published! Well never mind that. The stuff in this book, it’s out there Jerry. Really trippy stuff! And I think it points right at Mr. Appalachia!

JERRY: Carpathia.

KRAMER: Whatever. Anyway, I gotta work on my sermon. The people have got to be told, Jerry. The people must be told!

JERRY: Don’t you read the paper, Kramer? Carpathia is the head of the U.N. now.

KRAMER: So?

JERRY: The U. (pause) N. You know what that stands for?

KRAMER: What?

JERRY: The United Nations. Look, we have a President of the United States, and he’s one of the most powerful men in the world. This guy is basically the president of the United Nations, and a nation is a lot more powerful than a state!

KRAMER (worried & confused): So what are you saying, Jerry?

JERRY: I’m saying the U.S. is a nation with a president, and the United Nations has the US as one of its nations. So the Secretary General of the U.N. is like the President of Presidents, the King of –

KRAMER: Hey, watch it now!

JERRY: I’m just saying you might want to be careful about calling him names, because if you’re right, he’s not only really powerful, but pretty evil too. You know, like the “hiring goons to take you out” kind of evil.

KRAMER (shocked and nervous): Really? You think so?

JERRY: Oh I think so!

KRAMER (sounding choked): But I’ve already started telling people he’s the Anti-Christ!

JERRY: Well, you should stop telling people. Heck, you should try to figure out a way to un-tell people if you can.

KRAMER (looking panicked): I gotta go!

KRAMER bolts out the door, slamming it behind him. JERRY looks mildly amused, walks over to the couch, picks up the phone and starts dialing.

JERRY: Hey Elaine! You going to church on Sunday? Hmm… hey, have you seen my new apartment yet?

[END SCENE]

Left Behindfeld, Act I, Scene I

Left Behindfeld: a comedy about a book about nothing. The following covers the "activity" of Tribulation Force from pages 60-74

Featuring:
“Buck” Williams = Jerry Seinfeld
Rayford Steele = George Costanza
Chloe Steele = Elaine Bennis
Rev. Bruce Barnes = Kramer
Guest starring Christina Hendricks as Hattie Durham
Plus special guest star playing the role of Nicolae Carpathia


ACT 1
[SCENE: New York Chicaco street sidewalk. GEORGE and JERRY are walking along the sidewalk.]

JERRY: So, did you see the see the newspaper item about your old girlfriend?

GEORGE: My what? Jerry, you know I married my high school sweetheart. True, she vanished in the Event, but I haven’t had any other girlfriends.

JERRY: What about the stewardess you always hung around with? You know, the one you were always flirting with?

GEORGE: Oh yeah, Hattie. She was something, wasn’t she? Too bad it never went anywhere.

JERRY: Yeah, why didn’t it go anywhere?

GEORGE: I’m a married man, Jerry! I have principles!

JERRY: Principles like constantly flirting with a subordinate at work and stringing her along with stories of how unhappy your marriage is?

GEORGE: (glares at JERRY) (pauses) So what was this newspaper item about?

JERRY: Oh, so you remember how I introduced her to that Nicolai Carpathia guy? Turns out, not only is he now Secretary General of the U.N., but that he really needed a good personal assistant. Guess who he hired?

GEORGE: No way! I remember hearing about him getting that job. Wait, weren’t you supposed to cover that story?

JERRY: I did cover the story, remember? He shot the guy who was helping him, and then covered it all up!

GEORGE (sarcasticly): Oh that’s right. Big cover-up. That only you know about. Which is why you’re reading about the news instead of writing about it now.

JERRY: Ha ha ha. Very funny. Anyway, I just though you should know your ex-girlfriend is working for the Anti-Christ, and they’re both in town for some conference.

GEORGE: Hmm... hey! I’m going down to Kramer’s church for services Sunday. You gonna be there?

JERRY: I dunno. I’ve got to get home to check my messages, and I’m meeting with Kramer in a few hours. Will Elaine be there?

[END SCENE]

Monday, September 14, 2009

Foven meets Nicolae, Part 2

I walked into Nicolae's office, ignoring the sweet-smelling woman who ran after me, shouting something I didn't understand. "What have you done with Mellio?" I asked.

He spoke a sentence or two in six unfamiliar languages before finally coming out with some fluid, unaccented Hembrai. "My dear Foven. I understand how distressed you are, but I have done nothing with your young friend."

I think he expected me to be impressed that he knew my name, and who Mellio was. I wasn't: Onis Reeve could probably have done the same. "If you didn't take him, you know who did," I said, also in Hembrai.

"My dear Foven, if I knew who had taken the children, do you really think I would keep it to myself?" Andaroi this time, as smooth and accentless as his Hembrai. Again, I had the feeling I was supposed to be impressed, but the Guild is full of mages who can do that.

I answered in Andaroi, just to show him he couldn't outdo me. "Yes. You are a deceiver."

"A deceiver? You wound me. I want only to lead the people of the world through this terrible time and into peace."

"That might be what you want." I couldn't keep up the Andaroi, so I switched to Arinese. "But that's not what's going to happen. I know someone just like you - he's full of the best intentions, and somehow all he ends up with is a bucket of warm piss."

"You are speaking of the healer Dasil," he said, in perfect Arinese. "It's quite understandable that you distrust him, but he has your best interests in his heart - just as I do."

That unnerved me. How did he know I was thinking of Dasil? Had he checked me out so thoroughly, or could he somehow sense my thoughts? Either possibility could be terrifying, but having come this far, I couldn't let him see my fear. "Dasil's concern for my best interests always seems to make me feel more wretched, and I have the feeling yours may work out the same way."

"My poor Foven." His voice brimmed over with pity that sounded all too genuine. "Open your heart and trust a little."

"I've read about you," I said. "The Final Era book. It lays out exactly what you're going to do. What you've already done."

"Lies." He took a couple of steps towards me, and I had to back away. "Lies, spread by misguided fools. I'd like to help them all to see the error of their ways, but life is just too short."

He reminded me more and more of Dasil with every word. Something about the aching pity in his voice, and the way he tried to wriggle out of everything. "If it's all lies, what's the truth? What's your real agenda?"

"I already told you, my friend. Bring the people of the world through this terrible time and into peace."

It was a dangerous thing to want, even if he was telling the truth. I knew my history - rulers started out trying for peace, and ended up compromising themselves into oblivion. And the way he was going about it - persuading the rest of the world to join with him and give up their most powerful weapons - could only end in disaster. "You know you're bound to fail," I said. "And I didn't come here to argue about that. Tell me where Mellio is."

"Foven." His voice had a hard edge now, no more of that bleeding pity. This was the point where Dasil would have shoved me towards the refectory or poured something down my throat, but Nicolae could do much worse. "You do not wish to oppose me. It is not wise."

He was right, of course. But since I caught the pox, my life has been one long series of things I didn't wish to do and still did. As for wisdom, I'd long ago decided that was the province of whole mages.

"My only agenda is to bring peace." His voice seemed to drill into my mind. "Your presence here is a wasteful distraction."

Dasil could have come out with the same thing, nearly word for word. And, just as I'd lost my temper with Dasil so many times, I lost it now with Nicolae. "Now listen, you pissing little idiot. Last year, I saw a dragon - an actual fire-breathing dragon. The man who summoned it wanted me to drink its blood and live forever, and I told him to piss in his kecks. Do you think I'm going to let you fool with my mind?"

"Fool with your mind?" The pity was back, like an unwanted touch that made my skin crawl. "My dear Foven, I would never do such a thing."

"You would. You just did. Do you think I can't feel magic being worked, just because I can't read glyphs any more? I'm blind, you fool, not stupid."

"All I want to do is bring peace-" he started again, this time in Hembrai.

That was when I realised there was no getting any sense from him. I hit him the hardest blow I could manage with my staff, and left.

Foven meets Nicolae

Waking up and finding Mellio gone was almost worse than waking up from the pox. Even as I first came out of sleep, I knew I was alone in the room; it went beyond the absence of his breathing into a definite sense that he was gone. I didn't think for a moment that he was at the privy or gone early to the refectory.

What I did think was that Dasil had taken him. Our truce had been holding fairly well for a month or so, but he was quite capable of moving Mellio into a different room to help me take whatever step he thought I should be taking next. And however much Mellio and I complained, neither of us had any right of appeal.

I lay for a while, trying to work out the best way to confront Dasil, but none of the outraged phrases that came to my mind ever made it to my mouth. While I was waiting for him to come in, I heard the most terrible sound from outside. Screams, cries, names called in desperation, swallowed up as more and more parents woke to discover their children gone.

The first few days were terrible. Parents stormed the Guild, insisting that the Masters had to find their children. No matter how many times Previs Corvus explained that they were doing all they could, they kept coming. I think they must have been doing the same thing to the sheriff's office, because Faric Faber threatened to put the city under martial law if they didn't disperse.

The Guild itself was less affected than the rest of the city: research mages don't usually have children. Some, like Noen, had had nephews and neices, and a handful of the students had had brothers young enough to be among the vanished, but Mellio was the only disappearance from within our walls. All the same, it changed us. Anything that didn't have a direct chance of finding the children was pushed to one side, and huge working groups formed to try different methods of searching. Algen, Tilf and Falla, of course, were at the heart of one of them, running the highest powered viewing spells there had ever been.

And I was on the outside. Oh, Dasil put me to work folding sheets and carrying teas for the mages who cracked under the strain, but there was nothing useful I could do towards finding Mellio and the others. I could only sit and listen to whole men doing their part, and simmer in the bitterness I thought Mellio had helped me banish.

But maybe I had banished it. I wasn't willing to accept, as I once had, that the situation was hopeless. I couldn't help by reading the glyphs, but I'd learned another way to take action. I could search for answers in my own way - I'd done it once, and I could do it again. So I asked Onis Reeve to find out what he could, and I kept my own ears open in the refectory, and between us we put a few pieces together.

There was never any direct evidence - it was even worse than the dragons. But this Nicolae Carpathia kept cropping up on the edges of conversations, until I wasn't ready to believe it was a coincidence. If he hadn't taken the children himself, he knew who had.

Wallen Ross's old assistant found the only piece of real evidence among Wallen's private books. It was a strange thing, an Andaroi translation of something from across the other ocean, and even worse written than that ridiculous Ersh book Mellio and I struggled with. It was about the "Final Era" - their idea of how the world was going to end. It began with the children vanishing into air; after that, a charismatic leader emerged who would bring war and chaos. They even named the leader: Nicolae.

The moment we'd finished reading, I asked Onis to find me a passage across the ocean.

Monday, August 24, 2009

Feasting on the Word

Buck lay on the guest bed of the house Bruce had helped him find. The former owners were with God, so it seemed all wrong to criticise their decor, but he couldn't stomach the weight of kitchy junk in the master bedroom.

There was one advantage, though: plenty of Bibles to hand. Buck had spent long enough listening to Bruce going on about "feasting on the Word" to decide it was something he wanted to try his hand at. He'd lifted the Bible from the master bedroom - with creased pages, pencil annotations, the lot - and now he was trying to make sense of it.

He started on one of the pages with the heaviest underlining, and followed the notes from there. But flipping backwards and forwards just gave his mind plenty of time to wander. This wasn't working the way he'd hoped.

Weren't the Gospels where it was supposed to be at? He leafed through until he found them, and there at least was some dialogue, and a plot he could more or less understand. What a revolutionary Jesus turned out to be, when you read it properly. All the things he'd thought he knew were wrong. This guy was a radical - almost a hippie.

If you want to be rich, give your money away. If you want to be exalted, humble yourself. Love your enemies, and pray for the ones who put you down.

He knew he was on the verge of something important, but he couldn't quite wrap his head around it. It was all so paradoxical. Of course, he knew that you just had to trust in God and everything else would fall into place, but he couldn't quite suspend his old beliefs. If someone put him down, it was only natural to strike back. How was anyone supposed to overcome that?

An image of Chloe came between him and the words. Sitting there with her hair all sleek and shiny - how good would it be to run his fingers through that hair? Tousle it up good and proper, and then steer her head gently downwards...

Jesus! He was supposed to be studying the Bible, not indulging his impure thoughts. Deep breath, get himself under control, and back to the Word.

The first shall be last and the last first. Everything was all back-to-front and upside-down. Did Bruce understand this stuff? He'd been at it for longer than Buck, of course, but if he could make sense of it, it wasn't impossible. Blessed are the meek...

No. It was no good. All the words in the world couldn't drive that picture of Chloe out of his head. Two-thousand-year-old words versus one of God's more delicious recent creations - there was no contest really. Jesus would probably understand anyway - wasn't He supposed to be all about love?

He reached for the phone.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Lead Thoughts and Lost Horizons, Part 5

[Note: This has been on hiatus far too long. I've been meaning to get back to it, but life just kind of passes by. Either way, my intention is to get an entry a week or so. There's much story left to tell.]

The dream slowly drifted away, leaving only the faint traces of a strange scene. He couldn’t remember specifics, only setting and idea. His dreams were always like that.

A sold out theater. Movie, live show, it didn’t matter. He’d been sitting half way back, in the middle of the main section of seating, surrounded by strangers, friends, and family. He laughed in all the appropriate places, cried at all the right times. He was part of the crowd. But he was still alone.

On either side of him were empty seats, oppressive in their silence.

The fact that he wasn’t in an empty bed surprised him, cleared away the last, lingering mists of the lethargic dream state.

Dawn.

He turned and looked at her, sleeping peacefully, the hint of a smile on her face. The clock on the night stand behind her read 2:04.

He wanted to go back to sleep but knew it wouldn’t happen now. He’d never been good at falling asleep, at least not since Basic. And a life lived in secret, first running around jungles and deserts, always in enemy territory, then on the lam, constantly in danger, hadn’t helped. It had been useful, had saved his life on several occasions. He wasn’t ready to give that up, even if he was capable.

He looked at Dawn again. He didn’t understand her, probably couldn’t. She’d let him in. He’d put her in danger, probably in more ways than he would ever know. But she, too, had put him in danger. They'd found him when he decided to stay in one place. Even though that had ultimately been good he still felt trapped.

“You deserve better,” he whispered. She didn’t respond. “You need to find someone who’s actually able to stay with you.”

He rolled out of bed, pulled on the pair of jeans sitting on the floor, and grabbed his cell phone from the nightstand on his side of the bed. He pulled Smith’s card out of the pocket of the jeans and snuck in to the living room. It was time to arrange a meeting, time to start moving again.

After he dialed the number he stared at the phone for a long while. It was a tougher decision than he’d realized. He knew he couldn’t stay, but suddenly realized he didn’t really want to go.

Still, he knew that in the end he had no choice. He pushed the call button.

The phone on the other end picked up on the second ring. “Smith.” It wasn’t the voice of someone awakened from sleep, but someone who was fully alert.

“I, uh…” he wasn’t sure what to say. He’d expected to leave a message on Smith’s voicemail. “This is, um, this is…Alex Simkins,” his own name sounded strange in his ears. “I’m sorry to bother you at this hour.”

“I’m always awake at this hour,” Smith said. “I assume you’re calling to talk about the job.”

“Yes.”

“Be at my office at 9. We’ll talk then.”

“Your office, 9 am.”

“That’s what I said. Anything else?”

“No, not right now, Special Agent Smith.”

“If you get in to any trouble with law enforcement, just show them my card.”

The call cut off.

He flipped the phone closed, stared at it for a moment, then turned back towards the bedroom. Dawn was standing in the doorway, loosely wrapped in a robe, arms crossed over her chest. She looked like she was about to start sobbing.

“So I guess this is getting to be a thing with me,” she said.

“What?”

“The men in my life disappearing from my bed.”

“I…” he had no idea what to say, “I can’t explain it. But this is what I have to do.”

“Yeah, whatever.” She shook her head, then turned and walked back in to the darkness of her bedroom. “You’re just saying that to make your cowardice sound like bravery, you know.” The challenge seemed to come from the walls around him.

* * *

He’d passed through Chicago a few times before, so he knew enough to head in to the city with enough time to account for traffic. But 290 was almost completely empty when he got on. He knew it was a weekday, probably a Tuesday, but those distinctions really didn’t matter anymore. His life had been lacking those standard demarcations for so long that he had a hard time remembering half the time.

It looked to him like the rest of the world had taken on that same attitude. Five cars were headed in to the city when he got on the road. A few more trickled on to the highway as he got closer in, but he never had to drop the Acura’s speed below 65.

Closer in to the city the highway passed next to the tracks for the El trains. Almost no one waited on the platforms. The trains seemed empty. Police with dogs walked up and down the platforms. He caught a glimpse of a cop checking the ID of a commuter.

Traffic began to slow down as he got closer in to the city. Several police cars and a SWAT truck sat off to the side of the road, lights on. Something was going on. Something serious. They generally didn’t send SWAT to car accidents.

The situation rapidly became clear. There was a security checkpoint. Two big, concrete barriers had been set across the ramp to Lower Wacker, forcing traffic in to a choke point that passed beneath a building that stretched across the highway.

He rapidly corrected his assessment. It wasn’t a choke point, but a kill zone. Several second and third floor windows in the building had been broken out. The snouts of .50 cal machine guns poked in to the open air, covering the roadway.

Traffic from the other direction, however, wasn’t being blocked. Apparently they were worried about something getting in to the city but not concerned about what might get out. Rob thought about the collection of guns in the trunk of the RSX and briefly regretted bringing them with.

But there was no way to know. Besides, what was he supposed to do with them? He sure as hell couldn’t have left them at Dawn’s place.

Even with traffic completely stopped the wait wasn’t long. There weren’t many cars and apparently the police weren’t requiring full searches.

An officer tapped on his window. He rolled it down and handed his license over.

“Alex Simkins,” the cop said, reading his ID. “What brings you in to the city today?” The question was delivered in a surprisingly pleasant tone.

“I have a meeting,” Rob replied, deciding not to take any chances. He flashed Smith’s card.

The cop’s eyes widened. He handed the ID back. “Well, then, you’re clear to go, sir.”

“Thanks, officer.” Rob decided to risk a question. “If I may ask, what’s going on?”

“I couldn’t tell you, sir,” the cop said. “I think you know the man to ask, though.”

“Ah. Thanks.”

“Have a pleasant day, sir.”

Rob tossed off a quick salute, rolled up his window, and drove in to Chicago.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Ray Goes to Church Part III

He didn't know how long he was in the cellar behind his house, hiding like a rabbit in its burrow. He wasn't proud of it—he hadn't planned on being down there for so long. It was just that every time he thought about crawling out of there, he never could seem to find the strength. It took all his efforts just to make it up the stairs so he could go outside to use the bathroom.

Most of his days were spent huddling in the dark, crying and weeping, checking every other hour near the burnt remains of his house for signs of his family, and weeping when he found none. He never thought it was possible to cry this much—he thought at some point you must reach your limit, but every time he thought he was done, something would remind him of Irene, Ray-Ray, or Chloe, and the tears would come again. Sometimes he found his hand lingering towards his gun. But he was too spent from grief to have the nerve needed to pull the trigger.

Food wasn't a problem: Irene had always worried about disasters, natural or otherwise, so their cellar was stocked to the brim with all varieties of canned food and bottled water. Trouble was he didn't have the strength to eat. Occasionally he would grab a can, open it, and slowly sup on it, but he felt no hunger, no desire for any nourishment of any kind.

But at some point, he must have reached the end of tears, at some point, the paralysis that had gripped him, had kept him in the dark, lifted, and he found himself staggering off of the cot he'd slept on and staring at himself in the mirror.

I look like death, he thought. He couldn't recognize himself any more. His beard had grown long and his clothes hung loose around his waist. "And you said, 'I'd never get back to my playing weight,'" he muttered, looking at a picture of Irene in his wallet. He would have laughed, at that moment, if he hadn't felt so much like crying. Then he heard it—the sound of footsteps above his shelter. Immediately he grabbed his gun. He didn't know if he could hold off any gangs, but he was sure as hell going to try.

He peered out of his shelter, wincing as he heard the door creak, only to see a sight he never thought he'd see again. "Chloe..." he choked.

There she was, pale as death, leaning on the arm of her roommate, Vivian. His wife had never liked Vivian and truthfully, Vivian had always worried him a little, with her wild hair and clothes, but she and Chloe got along well; they had been roommates since they were both freshman. Last time, he had seen Vivian, her hair was electric blue and she was showing some new midriff tops, the better to show off her belly ring; this time, however, Vivian was like Chloe, dressed in shapeless baggy clothes. He wondered what was with her—Vivian had always leaned towards bold clothing—but then it was obvious; they weren't dressing to make a fashion statement: they were dressing to protect themselves.

"Chloe!" he shouted, so happy to see her alive that he forgot all about hiding from the gangs.
Vivian glared at him. "I don't know who you are, but you got your turn, so lay off. I've got a gun and I'm not afraid to use it."

Ray sat his gun on the ground as a gesture of good faith and raised his hands. "It's okay. I'm her father."

Vivian turned her head and Ray began to wonder if putting his gun on the ground was such a good idea. "You are," she finally said, with a pained smile. "Geez, you look like hell."

Ray ignored her comment. "You girls eaten yet?"

"No. We used up our last rations days ago." And he knew this was the truth; both Vivian's and Chloe's eyes betrayed a certain hollowness that comes with hunger.

"Follow me." And he led them down into the cellar.

Vivian led Chloe to one of the cots, leading her by the arm as if she was a child. So far, Chloe hadn't said a word, which was new for her. What happened to his bright, vivacious girl who was always full of news to tell? God did, that's what. God had ripped everyone away and reduced his bright daughter to a shell.

He still remembered the words he had said back at the church, but he didn't think much on them. They were fine words but what good was all this moral posturing when he was up against something like this? He turned on the hot plate and heated up some Dinty Moore for Chloe and Vivian. Once it was ready, he ladled some onto some Boy Scout bowls.

Vivian swallowed her food eagerly, barely bothering to blow on the food to cool it, but Chloe sat, staring into space. Vivian licked her bowl clean and turned to Chloe. "Clo, you've got to eat." When Chloe did not move or respond, Vivian sighed and began feeding her. Judging by the bored expression with which she did all this, this was not something new for her.

When the meal was over, there was nothing left except for an awkward silence. Chloe didn't want to talk; he didn't know what to say to her anyway. Only Vivian had the courage needed to break the awkward silence. "So what's the plan now? I mean, I came this way to protect Chloe, and besides I don't have a home to go home to anymore, so I'm kind of wondering what to do now."

"You can stay with us," he said. But as he spoke, he was already calculating how much longer his food stash was going to last, now that he had two more mouths to feed. But he couldn't just turn a young girl outside alone. He started gathering his remaining canned food and water. "I think I know a place we can go for now. Can you help me with all this?"

"Sure." They started gathering armloads of cans and bottles while Chloe sat listlessly on the camp bed.

"By the way," Ray asked. "Do you really have a gun?" Another gun would help add to their protection.

Vivian shook her head. "I was bluffing and hoping like hell you wouldn't call me on it."

"I see." They forced the door to the shelter open and peered cautiously before stepping outside.

The car was where he had left it. The windows were smashed out and the sides were covered in dents but it still looked drivable. They dumped the food and water in back and ran back to the shelter.

"You get Chloe," Ray said. "I've got a few more things to take care of." The two girls climbed the stairs, leaving Ray alone in the pit that had been his home. He looked around for a moment before grabbing some more ammunition for his gun. You never know when you might need it, he thought.

Friday, June 26, 2009

The Delusions of Buck Williams, Part 3

Buck Williams arrived two hours later with a briefcase in one hand, a laptop case in the other, and a phone cradled on his shoulder. The other reporters were giving him looks and smiles. Verna and Alice had shared a quick discussion on what to tell everyone else and had decided to explain Buck’s condition rather than leaving them to figure it out when he began explaining the Carpathia story. He noticed their undue attention, but just grinned and waved like a rock star getting off a jet.

Alice saw Verna put on her patient face to greet him.

"Cameron," she said in a carefully emotionless voice. "I didn't expect you till Monday."

"Just checking in," he said. "You can call me Buck."

"I'll call you Cameron, if you don't mind, and --"

"I do mind. Please call --"

"Then I'll call you Cameron even if you do mind. I’m a bit busy right now, so you’ll have to sit tight for a minute.”

He turned to Alice and winked confidentially.

"You can call me Buck," he whispered.

"Thanks," she said, pointing to a chair beside her desk. He sat down.

“Nice hair.”

“Thanks,” Alice replied, running a hand through her spikes.

“Does it take you long to do?”

“Not really.”

“It reminds me of a hedgehog. Do you curl up to protect yourself when you sense danger?”

“Umm…not usually,” she replied.

“Can I touch it?”

“I guess,” said Alice, and burst into uncomfortable giggles. Flirting hadn’t bothered her before the event, but now it seemed kind of wrong. Was it because flirting reminded her of dating, which reminded her of marriage, which reminded her of children? Probably not. It was just that it seemed inappropriate to have fun in the wake of so much tragedy. Buck was incorrigible, though, and kept the not-quite-funny quips coming even as she blushed and began shifting in her seat. She thought informing him that he’d been given the corner cubicle with the coffee maker might shut him up, but he only laughed and replied, “Ha! I bet I won’t be able to fit my designer desk in there. You should have seen my old office. It was huge, like a palace. Floor-to-ceiling window looking out over Manhattan!”

Alice felt a wave of relief wash over her as Verna opened her door and announced, “Cameron, I can see you now.”

Alice couldn’t hear the exchange taking place in the editor’s office, but she could see Buck’s dark eyebrows arching in exaggerated witticism and Verna looking at him over the imaginary frames of the glasses she didn’t wear but should have. Her expression gradually morphed from patience to tooth-gritting endurance, and she finally stomped out of the office with Buck in tow to show him to his cubicle. Alice almost offered to take him instead—she was his appointed babysitter—but Verna’s look of barely concealed rage quieted her.

As he followed, Buck made silly faces at the rest of the staff, imitating Verna’s walk and chuckling at his own antics. The others stared at him in bemusement, shooting looks at each other that asked whether it was okay to laugh at the mentally ill man. She heard one of the staff reporters whisper to another, “I guess he’s under the delusion that he’s funny?” and the other reply, “No, he’s always been like that.”

From the other side of the office, Verna mentioned something about insubordination and Buck exploded with a reply that the people on the street could probably hear. "No, Verna, what's out of the question is you trying to vent all your frustration from who knows where in one breath. You know as well as I do that no one with an ounce of self-respect would put up with this. If I have to work out of the Chicago area, I'm going to work at home with a computer and modem and fax machine. And if you expect to see me in this office again for any reason, you'll get Stanton Bailey on the phone right now."

Verna strode back to her office with careful composure, picking careful replies that would prevent another childish outburst.

"I will get Mr. Bailey on the phone if I can, but you realize it's late in New York."

"He's always there, you know that. Use his direct, after-hours number."

"I don't have that."

"I'll write it down for you. He's probably interviewing a replacement for me."

As she strode through her office doors, leaving them swinging behind her, she informed Buck, "I'll call him, Cameron, and I will even let you have your say, but I am going to speak to him first, and I reserve the right to tell him how insubordinate and disrespectful you've been. Please wait outside."

Buck emerged with a mischievous grin.

"Did you hear all that?" he whispered.

"I can hear anything I want," she mouthed. She knew that Buck loved phone gadgets, so she explained, "And you know those new speakerphones, the ones that don't make you wait till the other person is done talking?"

He nodded.

"Well, they don't make it obvious you're listening in, either. You just shut off the transmit button, like this, and then if something happens to hit the speakerphone button, oops, then you can hear a conversation without being heard. Is that cool, or what?"

“Yeah, that’s great! Turn it on,” he urged.

“No! Leave Verna alone,” she chided, but he had already leaned close to the speaker as though he was listening.

“Bailey’s answering and asking what she wants,” he whispered. “Now she’s saying she has a problem with me. And he’s telling her to leave me alone because I’ve got important assignments to work on.”

Alice looked at Buck in compassionate confusion. Was he just joking, or did he really imagine that he was hearing the conversation?

“She’s saying I’m insubordinate. He’s telling her to remember that I’m their greatest asset and to treat me that way.”

Alice couldn’t help a snort of inappropriate laughter and clapped a hand over her mouth, immediately feeling horrible that she found it funny to listen to Buck describing the fantasy conversation that only he could hear.

“She’s saying he should support her. And saying that I’m being inappropriate. And he asks—hee hee—if I made a pass at her! Can you imagine? And he’s telling her that this regional stuff is a waste for me and if she doesn’t like my attitude, that’s her problem.”

The intercom buzzed for real. "Alice, send him in."

The exchange was short and appeared more polite than previously. Buck left Verna’s office, pausing to tease Alice’s hair annoyingly before picking up his briefcase and laptop and sauntering off.

Alice knocked quietly on the glass doors. Verna looked up and wearily called, “Come in.”

“Is there anything I can get you? Like another cup of coffee or something?”

The editor shook her head silently. Alice looked at her and thought of how Buck had laughed at the idea of anyone finding her attractive. She wasn’t old and she had fine, if severe features. She wore a beige pantsuit and kept her honey-blond hair pulled back in a knot, which, along with her sharp gaze, gave her a no-nonsense air, but none of that was the problem. The problem was that she was exhausted. After Lucinda’s disappearance, she’d pulled an all-nighter, along with most of the fragmentary staff, just to get things organized enough to begin thinking about what needed to be done. Since then, she’d been doing the work of two while trying to cover the biggest story in history in the midst of Chicago’s barely controlled chaos. Her eyes were sunken and her face had a drawn look. Buck had come bursting in looking fresh, like he’d just finished a light workday after a good night’s rest and a hot shower. It felt like an insult to everything they’d been through.

She asked Verna, “What did Mr. Bailey say?”

Verna replied, “I told him that, for the first five minutes he was here, he had been not only constantly impudent and disrespectful, but also loud and disruptive. I told him that Cameron was going to need constant supervision simply to allow the other reporters to work. He told me that he didn’t want to fire Cameron after already penalizing him, even if he had already been effectively eliminated from the staff. I mentioned that Cameron wanted to work from home. He said that would be fine.”

“So Buck won’t be back in the office?”

“Hopefully not. If you could go tell Jimmy that he can email Cameron his stories, that would be helpful.”

“Of course, Ms. Zee.”

Thursday, June 25, 2009

The Delusions of Buck Williams, Part 2

“Global Weekly, this is Verna speaking. Hello, Mr. Bailey. Okay, what is it? Yes, you’ve told me. What? No, I just talked to him last week and he was fine. Arrogant, of course, but not crazy. You really think so? So he won’t be coming then. But why would we do that? We’re understaffed already without him getting in the way. Well, when you put it that way. All right. When is he coming? Couldn’t you have given me a little more notice? Yes, I have a desk for him, but…I suppose I have no choice, then. Yes, I'll have Jimmy handle it. Goodbye.”

Alice looked up curiously as Verna stepped out of her office, looking weary. “Buck trouble?”

“Cameron trouble, please. That nickname drives me up a wall. But it’s worse than that. I’ll explain in a minute, but can you get Jimmy for me?”

Alice nodded and dialed the intern’s extension. “Hey, Jimmy, Verna needs to talk to you.”

“Sure, just a minute,” came the reply. A few minutes later, a skinny, red-headed boy walked up, his thumbs hooked into the pockets of his jeans. Alice gave him an encouraging smile; Jimmy was shy to a fault and her abrupt summons had probably unnerved him.

“As you’ve probably heard, Cameron Williams is relocating to our office,” Verna began.

“Yes, I’m looking forward to meeting him,” said Jimmy.

“You say that because you’ve never met him,” Verna informed him. “But Mr. Bailey has just informed me of something disturbing. He says that he believes Cameron is suffering from post-Event delusions.”

“Cameron Williams? No way!” blurted Alice.

“I’m afraid so,” said Verna. “They’ve had a psychologist check him out and there’s no question about it. That whole big story he was chasing never existed.”

“Is it because of…” Alice asked quietly, and her boss nodded. She immediately felt awkward. An only child with teenaged cousins, she hadn’t lost any family members and only a few acquaintances, no close friends. People had been almost accusatory about this, as though her intact family was a failing of hers. But, in a way, it was: She couldn’t really understand what had happened. What would it be like, to put your baby down for a second, turn around, and find she was no longer there? The panicked search, the gradual realization that she was really gone, and then the waiting, hoping for the only thing left to hope for, hoping that the child would just come back the same way she had left. Alice had not been a part of it, and that divided her from most of the people left.

“So…” Jimmy began, looking a little lost.

“Mr. Bailey has always had a soft spot for Cameron,” Verna explained in a voice that made it clear that the publisher’s partiality was incomprehensible to her. “He wants to let him stay on here for a while. He wants one of the interns—that’s you, Jimmy—to write his copy for him and just give it to him for editing. Hopefully therapy will snap him out and he’ll be able to transition smoothly back into real journalism.”

Alice clapped cheerfully. “And in the meantime, you get a chance to put Buck in his place!”

Verna slumped a little and replied, “Now isn’t the time. We’ve been working double shifts to get the last few issues out. We just need to get back on schedule. There simply isn’t time for personal grudges. Jimmy, copy. I’m afraid you’ll have to pick up his big story about theories behind the Event, but the Weekly has been covering the investigative side since day one. I’ll tell you who to talk to and you’ll just need to do the writing. Alice, I know you’re busy, but it would be helpful if you could be Cameron’s babysitter. Just make sure he doesn’t get into trouble.”

“Of course,” said Alice with a nod.

“Thank you both.” Verna retreated back into her office, where she sat with her temple resting on her fingers, staring blankly at her monitor.

“Why would she need to get back at Buck Williams?” Jimmy whispered.

“Oh, well…he’s the old-fashioned type of journalist.”

“What does that mean?”

“Sexist.”

“Oh.”

Alice wet one finger with her tongue and began leafing through a stack of memos while she explained. “She’s a friend of his ex. He’s totally got it in for her. He’s been on her case ever since she got hired as Lucinda’s personal assistant. When he got promoted to editor, he came and totally shot her down just because he could. Told her she wasn’t going to replace Lucinda even though she’d been doing her job for a week.”

“Wow. And now she’s just going to let it slide.” Jimmy turned to look at Verna through her office’s glass doors. “She’s a saint.”

Monday, June 22, 2009

The Delusions of Buck Williams, Part 1

A tall, gray-haired man stepped forward to greet Sandra as soon as she stepped through the doors of the Global Weekly’s main office. “You must be Sandra Ramirez. I’m Stanton Bailey. I’m glad you were able to make it out here.”

A few weeks ago, such a statement would have been a polite formality, but now his words carried a serious weight. She had indeed had a lucky flight; just two hours of delays. She replied, “Thank you. I don’t usually travel so far to see a patient, but things have changed since the Event.”

Stanton replied to this almost ritual statement, “They sure have.”

There was a moment of respectful silence. Sandra broke it by asking, “Why did you want him treated at Jackson Park in particular?”

“Well, we wanted him to be near his ex-wife. She’s furious at him, but I’ve gotten in touch with her and she promised that she’ll help take care of him. Besides that, I’ve heard that Jackson Park has been expanding their psychology department to deal with the tragedy.”

“Yes, now that most of the emergencies following the Event have been dealt with, psychotherapy for former parents is one of the primary services we’re offering.”

“Well, come into my office and I’ll explain a little more about him.” Stanton waved for her to follow and led the way through the double doors that read STANTON BAILEY, PUBLISHER in frosted letters. He collapsed into a leather recliner behind an expansive mahogany desk while Sandra took a much more modest swivel chair. Clearly this man wasn’t afraid to use intimidation. He rested his head on one hand and sighed. “I just want you to know, he’s not that kind of person. He’s always been so grounded. Hell of a journalist. Pulitzer Prize winner. He was at Ground Zero during the attack on Israel. He was my top choice for editor when Steve left…”

Sandra interrupted gently. “Mr. Bailey, you don’t need to justify Mr. Williams to me. The Event effected all of us in different ways. A huge part of the population has some amount of post-traumatic stress disorder. There’s been amnesia—people completely wiping the Event from their minds. I’ve seen countless cases of delusions, everything from imagining their kids are still alive to seeing a fleet of alien spaceships coming to get them too. Most of these people never showed any symptoms before the Event. So please, stick to the pertinent details.” She pulled out a notebook and pen and looked at him expectantly over the tops of her frameless glasses.

“All right,” said Stanton with a slow nod. “He’s our top journalist, best we’ve got, so the instant this hits, Plank—that was our old editor—puts him on the story. But next thing we hear, he’s in London chasing some crazy conspiracy theory about the Jews. And then interviewing the President of Romania. We didn’t give him too much trouble at first because Carpathia has been shooting the breeze about all this and his theory was as good as any, but then he never gives us a story. The deadline comes and goes. The issue goes to print. Nothing. When Plank talks to him, he swears he’s onto a big story, but he has no sense that he’s ignoring the biggest story in history. And all this time—no copy. Not about the Event. Not about this conspiracy of his. Not a word.

“Finally, I tell him that he’s getting canned if he doesn’t produce something. He tells me that he’s got an invite to an exclusive meeting at the UN and promises that it’ll be the story of the year. I’ve got my suspicions by now, but he’s never let me down before. I let him go. And then I find out from some aides who were there that he spent the whole meeting in the bathroom, crying.”

“Mr. Bailey, that’s perfectly normal,” Sandra broke in. “We’ve all barely begun the mourning process. Breakdowns are prone to occur at any time. And, naturally, if he didn’t have control over himself, he couldn’t attend the meeting. You mustn’t be too hard on him.”

“But that wasn’t all,” replied Stanton. “At the press conference afterwards, he swore to me that he had been there, even though he couldn’t name a single person from the meeting except the ones he already knew. He had this cockamamie story about how Carpathia killed those two men who committed suicide. There was just no getting around it. He’d flipped. This whole time he’d been chasing a story that only existed in his head.”

“I see,” said Sandra, setting down her notebook.

“The thing is…” began Stanton, and hesitated.

“Yes?”

“The thing is, I was hoping we could break it to him easy. I’ve got a ghostwriter who’s going to do his articles for him and we’ll just let him edit the finished stories so he’ll still be getting his articles in the Weekly. I told him he’s just being demoted and transferred to our Chicago branch office. I hope that’s all right.”

Sandra sighed. “What’s done is done, but you’re making things worse by playing along. Sooner or later we’re going to have to break him out of his little world. But I’d better see him for myself.”

“Of course.”

Stanton rose and led her through the maze of cubicles to a desk where a man of about thirty sat, holding a phone to his ear. He was talking into it rapidly, brows furrowed in concentration, but when he paused to listen to the reply, Sandra could hear a familiar beep and a canned voice saying, “If you’d like to make a call, please hang up and try again.”

“Buck—hey, Buck!” said Stanton.

The young man cupped a hand over the phone and looked up.

Stanton said, “I have a someone here I’d like you to meet.”

Saturday, June 20, 2009

UN Dungeon Crawl: Scene the First

The party:
Buck (Half-Elf Bard)
Rayford (Human Fighter)
Steve (Dwarven Rogue)
Chloe (Human Cleric - lawful good!)
Bruce (Human Mage)


DM: Okay, guys. You're standing at the entrance to a colossal, monolithic fortress of the Assembled Kingdoms in the heart of New Y...Waterdeep, this is. Or Schmew Mork. Whatever. It's a phenomenally ugly building, the infernal architecture hinting at the terror that lies within the walls. What foul excuse for government goes on here! And how can the populace remain so blind to its fiendish purpose? But you must enter! You know that this is the headquarters of the evil wizard Nikolius Alpsius, and that he's incredibly close to seizing control of the whole world. What's your plan?

Bruce: My Scroll of Immutable, Infalliable Prophecy says that the "Agent of Bane" -- Nikolius, obviously -- is unstoppable, except after seven years when the messiah... wazziz his name in this game? Baldur? When he comes back to kick everyone's ass. So really, there's not much point in storming the castle.

Chloe: Dude, we're supposed to be heroes. If we don't try to stop Nikolius, he'll walk all over everyone. We have to try. Oh, and Daddy? Could you mention to the Bard that he could maybe ask me out if he wants?

Rayford: Why don't you tell him yourself? Wink, wink...

Chloe: I think my god wouldn't approve. I'll never level up if I incur the wrath of my deity by speaking to an older man about romantic topics.

Rayford: Good point. Hey, Buck, I notice you seem to be quite taken with my daughter.

Steve: Wait. Is she your daughter in-game too? Because that's sort of weird.

DM: Excuse me, can we play? How are you all getting into the Assembled Kingdoms building?

Steve: Well, the wizard thinks that our bard is his agent, so why doesn't he go in first and check it out?

Buck: But.... but we'll be separated then. I'd rather not be alone. I need to have protection--

Chloe (aside, blushingly): Oh, he is soo thoughtful.

Buck: --from the guards. Can someone come in with me?

Bruce: No, you'll be fine. The wizard even gave you an invitation to the meeting he's holding. If you get into that, you'll see everyone who's involved and you can write a song about it later so the whole world will know about the evilness of the wizard.

Steve: Good luck with that.

Buck: What do you mean?

Steve: It's just that you've never done, you know, the bard thing. When you tell people things that you know? And they listen to your skillful rendition? I've heard of it, but I've never seen it.

Buck: I sang in that pub just the other day!

Steve: Yeah, but you sang some incredibly old song that everyone already knew. You only got a few coppers from the drunk who felt sorry for you.

Chloe: Well, I'm sure you could make up a really good song anytime you wanted. Because everyone says you have like a super high intelligence and charisma score.

Buck: I don't like to brag...

Rayford (chuckles): No need to, Bucky Duck. You're obviously very...skilled.

Bruce (clears throat): Umm...

DM: Right. The bard approaches the entrance first? Is that what's happening?

Buck: Well, okay. But we need to communicate.

Bruce: Okay, everyone pull out your Tenser's Tiny Enchanted Earhorn! Remember, we can use them to talk with anyone from the party, but they have limited charges. Use them wisely.

Buck: YES!!!!!!

Rayford: YES!!!!

Steve: YES!!!!!

Chloe: YES!!!!!

Bruce: YES!!!!

DM: Jesus Christ.

( End scene. Pause play for Doritos and Mt. Dew.)